Last night while I was trying to sleep,

My son's voice I did hear,

I opened my eyes and looked around,

But he did not appear.


He said, "Mom, you've got to listen,

You've got to understand,

God didn't take me from you, mom,

He only took my hand.


When I called out in pain that day,

The moment that I died,

He reached down and took my hand,

And pulled me  to His side.


He pulled me up and saved me

From the misery and pain.

My body was hurt so badly,

I could never be the same.


My search is really over now,

I've found happiness within,

All the answers to my empty dreams,

And all that might have been.


I love you all and miss you so,

And I'll always be nearby.

My body's gone forever,

But my spirit will never die.


And so, you must all go on now,

And live, and understand.......

God did not take me from you,

He only took my hand."

If we had one lifetime wish
one dream that could come true
we'd pray to God so hard,
for yesterday and you.

They say memories are golden
well, maybe that is true,
but we never wanted memories,
we only wanted you.

The things we feel so deeply
are the hardest things to say
but we, your family, love you
in a very special way.

If teardrops were a stairway
and heartaches made a lane
we'd walk a path to heaven
and bring you back again.

A thousand times we've needed you
and a thousand times we'll cry
if our love could have saved you
you never would have died.

How can anyone in a few words ever  describe Scott Allan Smith? Scott had this witty and uncanny sense of humor. In his short life of 15 years he accomplished as much as what I have seen some adults that lived a long lifetime. He taught me many things and what it meant to be truly happy. I never realized how meaningless and empty my life was until I became a daddy. I am and was very proud of Scott for what he accomplished in such a short time in his life, He made me and others smile and look at the brighter side of life.  He filled a void that I never even knew was there. He made me smile when I was sad and made me laugh until I cried. I remember his toothless grin when he was 6 and his tight hugs and I remember the joking around we did when we traveled down the road. I remember how much I still love him and miss him so much. When sometimes sick he still managed to bring a smile upon faces. I  remembering when driving back from my last photo shoot, remembering how Scotty would be riding back with me and this time he wasn't. This brought back many memories when I did come home in the past, in the middle of the night, to see my little buddy asleep on the couch, waiting for me to come home and to see how the shoot went, and to greet me when i come home. I would awake him talk to him a bit and send him off to bed. It meant a lot to me to know that time after time In being gone away from home and my family that when I come home, that Scotty was there waiting for me and even when he couldn't stay awake to greet me, that he tried and he was there. Yes he was always there to help work on a car or to cut grass, a fix-it job around the house, best of all he was there as a friend to be with and a great son. What else could a Dad ask for. I am so grateful for the time I had with Scott, It hurts to see your dreams and hopes be taken away of a child with such promising potential. The dreams of seeing him get his drivers license, to drive that camero again, to go to the prom,graduate, get married someday and have and raise children, I know without a doubt Scotty would have been such a good father, those dreams for Scott are now memories of past hope.  It only hurts so much to know, that the time we had are now memories, a big piece of my heart I feel is removed from me and I will always love and miss him so much. This all tells me that God saw what we had here with Scott and is now enjoying the love and Joy I was fortunate to have for a short time.                

         Gone Home Above

My little buddy has gone home to the heaven above,
somebody said the lord sends us warm love,
It hurts to think of him being taken alone
Where I couldn’t protect him and guide him through.
But I know God does that, he cares for you.

 I remember my little buddy as a little boy,
When he played so much with his box of toys.
He did no wrong, no wrong I could see at all.
He was creative, and so full of life
Energetic, full of love, positive and caring.
His life was giving and sharing 

I would help him up each time he'd fall,
Some body help me up cause now Ive fallen,
fallen for the heartache OH the heartache is hurting so bad,
I know my little Buddy wouldn't want me to be sad,
but its to late for that,

He brought us Cheer and times of laughter
When things were serious and didn’t really matter
When we went to work so often together
He made the day all so much better.

 He loved the babies we took pictures of,
As he smiled at them, he got them a grin.
As he moved the props and things so carefully
He Made me proud and happy to be a Dad daily. 

I would introduce Scott as my Son with pride
I’d see him smile and know it made him feel warm inside.
He was my buddy, my friend, my boy
Together we were a team and had laughter and joy.

 And now I see those times are past
I prayed to the Lord Please, Lord No
Why couldn’t it Last?

 I never got to tell him good-bye,
I think of him daily and start to cry.
I love my little buddy and I'm sure he knows,
Somebody please help I want my little buddy back!

 I know in Heaven If things weren’t cheery
Scott has changed things and made things merry.
If God has a serious Moment, like I have had
Scott smiles at God and makes him Glad.

 I know this little boy oh so well
That God is now happy to have him there.
If Heaven is all that we are told it is to be
Then Saints are crying from laughter, you see.
This boy with humor and a brighter side
He will make God Smile forever to be.

I feel so lost

Because of the days that have past

Without you Scotty

I don’t know how I will last

You’ve been my best friend

And yet you were so young

I was your Dad

And you my Son.

We talked a lot

And laughed together

It seemed sometimes

It would last forever.

We traveled around

And worked a lot

With you there with me

The Job was easier to be

You made work fun and cheery

Even when times were rough and dreary

You had this magic of making people smile

Maybe it wasn’t magic, it was just your style.

A smile is contagious as I told you so much before

When you give a little smile you get back so much more

It lightens a heart, and it opens a door.

That door can be jammed to many hearts you see

But Scotty when you smiled you set those hearts free.

Some of those hearts that were stern with faces of iron

You melted those faces and broke loose those frowns.

They were determined at first to be mad

But boy when you got finished you made people glad.

That smile you carried was so priceless to me

I took pictures of it often so others could see.

I display them now with the pride of a father

Because you Scotty won my heart

As a son , a friend and a buddy.

Sometimes when traveling down the road

I remember looking over and seeing you deep in thought

I would say Scotty your going to smile and you said no I’m not.

I would persist on and it wouldn’t be long,

Scotty’s smile was there as he would sing a song.

He sang many songs on these trips to work

After a while I would join along.

What a duet we made Of course nothing for recording

But the memories it left me is a golden record in my heart.

Bohemian rhapsody, maybe a little Styx

A few church songs, but no country hicks.

These songs led to laughter and brought us some joy

It was good for me and this wonderful boy.

So somedays Scotty like I am right now,

I get real lonely and I get this frown

It’s not your fault , you can’t help my misery

So I think of those times we had in glee

I get this smile that you give to me.

Thanks for the lightness you brought in my life

I don’t know how you did it, so young you undid strife

You amazed me with your humor and sharp wit

You kept my mind sharp to keep up I had to be quick.

The worst that you hurt me, you could not help

It was when your life was taken from you as maybe you slept.

To see you laying there on a cold damp ground

I felt so helpless I could not make a sound.

I beg to god please don’t let this be

This is my boy this is My Scotty.

He brought us so much joy and happiness

Without Scotty we have so much less.

Dear Jesus, oh God let this be a dream

As I came to reality, I cried and I screamed.

Oh this hurts oh so bad it is hard to describe

It feels as someone has put a knife in my side.

They have cut in my heart so deep and severe

It will never heal, not in many years I fear.

I want to say Scott please come back

We Love you, we need you

You kept us intact.

So with this moment I write this to you,

Always remember we loved you too.

We miss your sunshine and your great words of wit.

And now that your gone our life seems like the pits.

I prayed to our Jesus please don’t let this be

Perhaps he needed you, like we did you see.

You’re a bright star in heaven

You’re an angel to me

So keep on smiling Scotty

Remember ALWAYS, you will be My Buddy.